Miss Universe FAIL

HAHAHA uh what...??? I can't believe that these are the questions that the Miss Universe Pageant asks their contestants for a media video promotion. Freaking Donald Trump and his fluffy orange hair transplants. This is how I'd answer his inane questions if I were Miss Genovia:

1) Being a woman, what piece of advice would you give a man?

(M: Calling out "konichiwa","mamacita", and "me love you long time" when I walk past you on the sidewalk will not induce me to turn around, flash you, and give you my number.)

2) What was the best gift that you have ever received?

(M: My ex-lover's eyeballs after I accidentally spilled photo chemicals on my face. Yea, it was super sweet of him.)

3) What was the worst date that you've been on?

(M: I've taken a vow to never date until married.)

4) Please make the following sound effects: Lion, Car starting, Rocket launching, Sheep, Cow, Robot.

(M: WTF?!! Should I even entertain this question? Chomp, Rrrrrrr, Bloop, Meh, Moo, BzztbzztFeedMeBrains. Are you happy now that I've demonstrated my ability to read childrens' books?! God, is that what all women are good for?!! *Storms off*)

Okay but seriously, I really don't really appreciate "THE MOST AWESOME WOMAN IN THE UNIVERSE" being judged by these criteria. These are topics that Maxim/FHM usually asks their Girl/Boobies of the Month. I don't expect much out of pageants anyway, but to see beautiful "smart" women subject themselves to stupid questions like these make me a little sad.

Here's an Epic Fail by Miss China. Oh Miss China, I want to pat your silly shiny head.