A Grand Day

I spent a really awesome Saturday at my grandparents' place, and sat with my 96 year old grandmother for a long talk. We discussed everything, from the daily mundane stuff (how she hates to eat fruit) to a heart-to-heart on life (see below). She dispensed advise that seems quite obvious, but when you've been survived wars, been orphaned, seen your children die, dealt with a stodgy stingy old husband for 75 years, settled in a foreign country, and have seen the world change so much... I will respect everything that you have to say. I will not brush off her opinions as old-fashioned, in fact they are distilled from a culmination of all those life experiences. My grandmother is a very modern lady of her time. She finished high school on scholarships, worked in Shanghai in a bank away from her Jiangxi village, dated and picked her own husband, raised 7 children by herself, got her college degree at age 70, is a highly accomplished artist. Feisty, independent, free-thinking, if she were born in this day and age then I really believe there is no limit as to what she could accomplish.

- 你要記得永遠要看得開，可以讓就讓。
- 不要把錢看成很重要，夠用就好了。
- 你找的男人一定要老實，這基本上就好了。（我：哪有那麼容易！）
- 每件事情要成的話就要有天時地利人和，不能勉強的。
- 一定要快點買房子。（我：呵呵，但我沒有錢？）

She held my hand while saying all this, I savored her warm and firm grip.
We also had a really funny chat with Andrew that I recorded on my phone. It has a hilarious moment when we eat an unripe persimmon together and all unceremoniously spit it out. I'll put it up on my blog one day, it's a gem. :)

My grandfather asked me whether he would actually live to 100. He is 99, and his birthday is in May 2013. I said "Of course, and I'm flying back to celebrate with you!". But he asked so bluntly that I almost choked, and my answer was of course, uncertain. I don't know whether he asked me because he wanted reassurance, or whether he asked to ready my expectations. Knowing that this is a question that he thinks about really broke my heart. How do you face death? And how do you celebrate life at that age? And can I imagine life without him? Or that the loved ones I have beside me will one day leave me? I've been blessed to everyone whom I care about be by my side still, and I wish I could freeze moments like these forever. Just typing this out and knowing that it's impossible makes me want to cry.