Gone Fishin'

I'm leaving today to go on a 2 week tour of Eastern Europe with Mother Dearest. We're going on a retired person tour, which I don't particularly mind so long as I don't have to nod politely and smile all day. Here are the spots we're going to hit up:

• Berlin, Germany
• Warsaw, Poland
• Krakow, Poland
• Budapest, Hungary
• Bratislava, Slovakia
• Prague, Czech Republic

It's going to be my very first trip to Europe!!!!!! I heard from people that these cities that I'm seeing are gorgeous, and I'm trying to do a bit of reading beforehand so I can appreciate it in a historical context as well. I'm a bit ashamed to say that I really am not as well-traveled as I would like to be, but a couple years ago a Europe trip would have been way too expensive with the Euro/Pound vs. Dollar valuation. If only I were still employed... then I'd totally splurge on [ insert fashion item ] instead of begging for a loan from Bank of Mom. :/

In the spirit of Eastern Europe, I will leave you all with a little something that will change the way you see The Count and Sesame Street forever. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah....! >:)

Baby's First Steps

I have a HUGE announcement to make! This probably seems ridiculous to non-New Yorkers, but today...

I drove on the highway!!!!!

This picture is not the highway.

I am also concentrating relatively hard.

I got my driver's license sophomore year (of college), but in New York City it's not necessary to learn how to drive on the highway in order to get your license. So I didn't. And I passed anyway!

I always imagined my first time on the highway to be like the movie Clueless when Cher's BBF Dionne goes completely banshee on her boyfriend... and in some way it was, because I ended up on the Cross-Island Parkway totally by accident. My dad was letting me drive his beat-up 14 year old Geo Prism through Bayside to Fort Totten, when he told me to make a right. What he failed to let me know was the immediate right was an entry to the highway, so as we merged into the incoming 60mph traffic I was thinking, "Ohhhhh.... fck yea!". There's no way that my dad would have let me practice the highway on purpose, but the gods deemed that it was time. :) It was super easy though, so now that I've made this public announcement can I finally gain some highway cred? (Haha get it? o_o)

A notable (not confidence-building) conversation with my dad about diamond-shaped car window signs.

"People need to know that you drive carefully. You should get one of those signs, maybe 'Baby on Board' or 'Student Driver'... or even better you should get one that says 'Baby Driver'."

"...Baby Driver?!!"

"Yes, I think that would be best."

"Dad, I don't think they make those... people are going to be so confused."

"Baby behind the wheel."

This is my dad. We're at Fort Totten's man-made boulder pier, with the Throgs Neck Bridge in the background. Almost each rock is graffiti'd with a strange, almost unintelligible pseudo-love story. Case in point: Aight n*gga I be writing you a story aight? So I love Melanie. She be my bizzle fo shizzle and she lahv me too :) We wrote on almost every rock lalala my marker's going to die 4.21.10! okay *heart* :) BYE A big high five to the New York public education system.

Also after taking these pictures, I didn't drink any more soda.

If you lose a bet against me...

The next time I make a bet with someone (male-only), I'm going to send them to "Stylist Rico London". HAHAHAHAHA. Thank you NYTimes for making me laugh out loud at 9:30am. :)

Stylist Rico London has become well known at Levels Unisex, a barber shop in East Harlem. He's particularly known for his sculptured designs.

Elvis Acevedo gets his hair styled by Mr. London for the first time. Mr. London says he freestyles haircuts and is inspired by clients' personalities.

In addition to haircuts, Mr. London also draws complementing designs on clients’ faces.

Pimp-nasty. That shit better be in permanent marker! [My own caption, not NYTimes']

One time I won a bet with a co-worker and he had to grow out his beard for a week and then shave half of it off at work (vertically down his face). Even though the conditions were that he had to don it for the entire day, I took pity that he had a 12 o'clock meeting with our MD and let him retire early. I am so benevolent. :) If I lost that bet I would have had to shave my eyebrow like Vanilla Ice, but girls can always fill that stuff in with makeup later.

This Elvis dude got a scraggly squiggly mustache... what would you think if Stylist Rico London drew some thick handle bar or a soul patch on you? What does it say about your personality? I actually don't think I'd mind having someone draw a mustache on me if I lost a bet, so long it was just a mustache and none of the other passed-out drunk stuff that people do to you. :p

南京大學 Elevator Confidentials

Hahaha oh my god. I'm totally looking forward to getting to know these fools in September!

What am I?

Any idea what this is, people?

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My dad showed me this picture and I swear I didn't know what I was looking at for a full 5 seconds until I noticed a sliver of an ear peeking out of that huge lump of fur/blubber/脂肪.

You are a [wonderful] fat-ass feline. :)

Rockaway Surfing

A happy bunch of ninja sealions.

Ed: Um, why are you emoting the number 6?

M: Cowabunga, dude!

Just came back from a weekend of what was basically a glorious marathon Columbia reunion + their Significant Others. I went hungry hippo in K-town with BBQ marinated meats, cheap Korean lounge beers, Billy's Bakery cupcakes, super delicious Italian at Pepe e Cacio. It's no wonder I'm at my "winter weight" right now (as my mom reminds me everyday), but who cares because I am doing physical activities too, like...

SURFING AT ROCKAWAY BEACH!

I didn't think that there was any surfing in New York City, but apparently people give lessons there with board and suit rentals, perfect for noobies. I've only gone surfing one other time (Ilan, Taiwan) but didn't really manage to stand up unless you count wobbly kneeling. This time however, I was able to stand for about 3-5 seconds a few times before bailing. Improvement is the stuff of life. :) I also managed to orchestrate/participate in a few spectacular surfing collisions, which was sadistically satisfying.

Even though it was only 70 degrees, windy, and overcast at the beach, the water was surprisingly bearable, even refreshing. We had a couple of friends sit out because they didn't want to risk entering icy water, but with booties and a 2-3mm wetsuit, I was nice and toasty inside. I had a terrific time out there with my homies, and I definitely recommend people to check out Rockaway Beach for a local adventure.

The cutest engaged couple that I know. Congratulations Hubert & Judy!

Compassion, Explained By the Ancient Chinese

慈悲，丁兆麟

Title: Compassion

Calligrapher: Chao-lin Ting, age 97.

I stopped by my dad's place a couple days ago, which is also his workshop where he frames many of my grandfather and grandmother's artistic pieces. My grandfather is a calligrapher and my grandmother paints traditional Chinese watercolor paintings. I'm really proud of their achievements and hope that I can too become a recognized calligrapher or painter one day. :)

I sat with my dad sipping tea as he unfurled a New York City bicycle map and started plot our Next Great Bike Ride. My 19 lb. cat-child, Xiao-hu (小虎), contently settled in on my lap with heavy eyes. My family expresses disbelief that temperamental Xiao-hu still recognizes me after my year in Taiwan. Well, cats don't dish out love like dogs... you've got to earn it, and that hard process is why I like befriending a cat more than a dog. (Not to say I don't like dogs! Please don't label me as a cat lady!)

Framing (biao hua, 裱畫) Chinese art is an extensive multi-step process, which takes 10 hours of STRAIGHT labor to complete. Unfortunately, people don't get paid much for this type of job, so my dad does it only as a hobby and personal favors. He pointed towards an unfinished piece hanging in the corner of the room. It is written in seal script (zhuan shu, 篆書), which is my grandfather's specialty.

"Do you recognize the word?" he asks.

"Ci bei (慈悲), compassion." I said.

"Good job, they look pretty funny don't they?"

"Well, it's because I recognized the bottom part of each word as a heart (xin, 心), and there aren't many words that have two characters each with bottom xins." (If you look exercise your imagination just a little bit you can see the chambers of the heart)

"Chinese is a very logical and expressive language. If you can see, the top character, ci (慈), is a smiling face. The bottom character, bei (悲) is a crying face. What it means is when someone is happy, you are happy too because you want them to live well. That is ci, kind and loving. But when someone is sad, you can feel their pain and suffering too, so you cry with them. That is bei, sorrowful and grieving. If you can exercise them both, then you have compassion."

Happy and sad. Normally when I see happy/sad faces I think of Greek theatre, but I like this association better. I find it very profound, even moving, to see such a complex concept encapsulated in two characters so perfectly.

Purr...! =^._.^=

Flushing (toilets), Queens

Flushing, Queens in 1930 vs. June 9th 2010 at the Main Street & Roosevelt intersection. See the same white and tan building with the watertower?

The one instantly recognizable building is the Bank of Manhattan building in the center of the photo. According to Wikipedia, the Bank of Manhattan merged with Chase National Bank in 1955 to create Chase Manhattan Bank...

The detail in this photo is incredible....the electric trolley, the policeman on horseback, the wonderful autos...fantastic!

I can only the imagine the shock and horror that the people in the photo might experience if they were magically transported to the present and could see Flushing today. In 1930, after all, the Chinese Exclusion Act was still in force (not repealed for another 13 years), and the idea that Flushing would become a predominantly Asian community would have been unthinkable to the folks in this picture, who no doubt were firmly convinced of the superiority of the Caucasian race. The images in this picture may be charming, but who can deny that some things have changed for the better in the last 77 years?

Flushing has been the core community for many waves of (mostly Asian) immigrants in New York for several decades. When people ask me where in New York I grew up in, I say Flushing even though technically I lived in Fresh Meadows. I just think it's easier for people to conceptualize my background using this identity, an ABC who wasn't born with a silver spoon in her mouth, but had everything she needed thanks to her hard-working parents.

I haven't been back in Flushing consistently since high school, so each time I go visit there's always something new, yet tacky/shoddily built. I'm going to be honest and say that Main Street, Flushing is disgusting. I don't like going there now because there's usually piles of garbage on the sidewalk curb, people openly spitting on the streets, pools of what seems to be sewage drainage... I wouldn't be surprised if we had major SARS/swine flu/elephantitis outbreak one of these days. New buildings are all tall and narrow because construction companies build 7 floor apartments on a single house plot. Roads are cracked like angry tectonic plates. Garbage cans overflowing with personal refuse. The Beijing couple who sat next to me on the plane to New York confessed to me, "Don't be offended, but Flushing seems to be very po lan (破爛)." It's true -- immigrants today probably now find that they aren't leaving their home country to a land paved with gold, but crumbling grey sidewalks dotted with decade-old gum. I suggested that they should consider buying a house in Bayside instead.

I asked my mom whether Flushing was always this gross and she said, "Yep, just about." Regardless, Flushing is still the nucleus that we revolve around, where we buy all our groceries (like bok choy, soy sauce, and all sorts of live-tank marine creepy crawlies), see our pediatric dentist for 20+ years, have Little Fat Lamb Mongolian Hotpot with friends. Ghetto fabulous, I guess...

Narita, Briefly

Just. Got. Home.

So happy. :)

I bought a one-way ticket from Taipei to New York on Delta Airlines, which had a brief layover at Narita Airport in Japan. Firstly, I want to declare that it's a crime that one-way tickets are priced almost the same as round-trip tickets. I'm pretty good at hustling when it comes to buying things (i.e. always check for online coupons when you purchase stuff off the internet!), so when I had to book my flight back home I used an ISIC student discount from Delta. Instead dishing out ~$1,000, I paid ~$600, which is still an arm and a leg and maybe an eyeball for poor 'ol me. Then, because both of my check-in luggages ended up extremely overweight, I was fined an additional $100. GAH! Serves me right for having a billion pairs of shoes. Oh, I love shoes.

I know that as an American there's this concept of "supporting our national industries", but sorry... Delta is a piece of crap airline. What airline does not have in-flight entertainment on international 13+ hour long-haul trips?! What is this latex/rubber covering over the seats?! Shitty rolly-eye stewardess service?! I felt like I was on Chinatown Bus in the Sky. The tiny flickering CRT televisions stapled on the ceiling 30 feet away definitely completed the effect.

Speaking about Chinatown, I thought I was going to die when a Chinese couple with a 7 month baby sidled up and settled in next to me. I offered them my aisle seat and they seemed pretty grateful since Doodoo Delta didn't provide the infant carriage that they had requested (the baby slept on the trays the entire flight). Fortunately, this squishy dumpling-faced dude was an absolute saint and didn't cry at all. It must be karma! Chinese babies are also tough and bad-ass. :)

The couple and I hit it up pretty well and they said that I should visit them in Beijing. The mom kept on sharing her peanuts with me, shoving me so many generous handfuls that I had to dump them into the barf bag. I really don't like peanuts, but I felt obliged to eat them every time she threw me an encouraging smile. Interestingly, the reason why they were visiting the States was because they wanted an out via a green card in case "China goes downhill". The dad, who had really beefy arms and I learned later was named Flex, freely talked about how government officials in China are all uncontrollably corrupt, how the smaller towns in China were now built more beautifully than Beijing/Shanghai, and how it was extremely hard to get a college education. Well, all that was very reassuring seeing how I'm trying my best to get into China whereas they're scrambling to get out.

While waiting at Narita, I learned a couple of interesting facts from an cartoon-themed airport show! The Japanese never cease to entertain me with their quirky factual programs.

1. Do the pilot and co-pilot eat the same kind of meal on the airplane?

No! It's to prevent food poisoning. (It must has happened enough in the past for this to be a rule...)

2. Why do we always exit and enter from the left on an airplane?

It's a custom carried over from the structure of a boat, which often times has its rudder positioned on the right. Like boats, airplanes also have "cabins" and "captains".

3. Why do the lights turn off in the cabin when airplanes prepare for a nighttime landing? (I always wondered about this one.)

To help passengers get accustomed to the dark in case there's an emergency, where the exits and aisle strips will light up.

Airplane-tested chicken pox Miffy t-shirt.

Goodbye Taiwan

I sit here now with 90% of my life's belongings beside me. Tomorrow I fly back to New York. Finally, a moment to properly reflect upon my 15 months here in Taiwan, aka Formosa the Beautiful Island.

I came here after the Lehman collapse so I could fulfill my lifelong goal of becoming fluent in Chinese. As a joke, I tell friends that when I first came to Taipei I ate beef noodles (牛肉麵) for one month straight because I couldn't read anything else on the menu. I admit, that's a bit of an exaggeration, because sometimes I'd toss in some dumplings (水餃) or something-something rice (??飯). Pointing and grunting is a crude yet effective form of communication. :) Anywhere.

My time here has now been somehow validated, since I scored a 6 on the TOP (equivalent to a 9 on the HSK). Now I hope that now language will not be a barrier in whatever I hope to pursue!

All in all, Taiwan has been very good to me... with the exception of the month-long epic battle with bronchitis, which I won with many casualties on the side. When I talk to people who have lived in many different big cities (i.e. New York, London, Hong Kong, Shanghai) they always say that the standard of living is highest in Taipei. This may seem strange for those who have never traveled here, but after being here for so long, I wholeheartedly love this place... I'd love to retire here someday. Hands down, Taiwan is one of the best places on Earth.

Don't believe me? Here are 10 brief reasons why Taiwan rocks my socks. :)

1. If you want to learn Traditional Chinese characters (vs. Simplified), Taiwan is where you must go. Sure from a practical standpoint over a billion people use simplified, but I am never one to take shortcuts when it comes to education. Plus, there's so much history and culture in traditional. Learning traditional after simplified will bust all your neurons, whereas (I've heard) converting to simplified after mastering traditional is a walk in the park. I'll give you feedback once I start grad school at Nanjing.

2. Taiwan is beautiful, with lush rolling mountains and sandy beaches. Many tracts of this island are preserved for people who love to explore nature. Taroko Gorge in Hualien is simply breathtaking and worth a trip.

3. The party scene is ridonkulously awesome, better than New York or Hong Kong. This is pretty much the consensus from everyone I know even though drinks are still ~$8-10 a pop. People party freaking hard here, and the usual scheme is: bar/lounge -> club -> karaoke -> stumble out into the daylight. My old bones can't handle it anymore!

Oh yes, and Kenting's Spring Scream totally lives up to the hype. Go.

4. If you like biking, then you will thank the Taipei city government for the hundreds of kilometers of freshly paved and wondrously smooth bike paths. I spent a lot of quality time with my dad along the riverside parks. :)

5. Adventures are easy to find in Taiwan! I learned how to surf and scuba dive. I've also gone hiking up a river and paintballing.

6. Taipei 101 is pretty snazzy! Unfortunately it's now demoted to the #2 tallest building in the world, but it still looms over Taipei like a benevolent giant... shaped like a phallic bamboo that explodes on New Year's (heh heh heh).

7. I reserved the 7th bullet for... 7-11!!! There is no where... NO WHERE, that surpasses Taiwan in convenience (stores). I have 4 convenience stores within a 2 block radius, the density is mind-boggling! Family Mart, Hi-life, I don't discriminate so long as they stock Yakult!

8. The art scene is totally happening here. David LaChapelle chose to have his first Asian exhibition right here in Taipei. I missed Cai Guo Qiang (蔡國強)'s New York exhibition in the Guggenheim, but caught it here.

9. Taipei is really cheap to fly in and out of (probably due to its crappy airport), but because of this I've gone to Hong Kong, Japan, Korea, and Malaysia during my time here. Whereas when I was in New York I went to Philly, Boston, and perhaps the Jersey Shore. Booyah, pwned!

10. The best for last... FOOD. Gah, I'm going to miss the food here in Taiwan so much! I can go on and on about what to eat here, but instead I'd rather point you to this Taipei restaurant review website. I can usually feed myself very well for less than $5 USD, sometimes $2-3 even. A poor unemployed woman's gastronomic dream...

Well I'm gonna miss ya Taiwan, but not too much because there are still many places in the world to explore. Plus, I feel like Taiwan's my second home now, and we've always got to come home once in awhile. :)