ToaSG: No. 3

Today Auntie Vivian invited me to join her for dinner and her fortune-teller friend. Being that it's a fresh new year, my birthday just passed, and I'm preparing for a huge new business launch, I was extremely curious to see what the fortune-teller had to say about the year ahead.

It was all very reassuring... not because everything would necessarily go smoothly (I didn't get a Pass Go and Collect $200 deal, so no free lunch there) but she gave me some insight on how to best approach certain obstacles. I'm not afraid of challenges -- I'm afraid of feeling lost... so all I need is some sort of direction or a tool to work with. Even if I didn't believe her predictions and analyses, her advice was still extremely wise and applicable.

I'm not going to divulge work-related prophesies to keep true to the nature of this blog. BUT I will say what she said about my lurvvvvvvvvvvvvv life. :) She started off with:

啊呀，妳的八字在這方面太厲害了！
[Aiiyah, your bazi characters are tremendously lihai....!]
***厲害 lihai can mean everything from extremely difficult to extremely terrible to extremely awesome

Shit... am I doomed?! My head immediately whipped towards her direction. I must have looked like this: O_O I certainly felt like a deer in headlights.
It was a long 0.5 seconds. Hahaha.

But whew, luckily the next few sentences that came out of her mouth were positive to the Nth degree. I KNOW THIS IS SO STUPID (who believes in fortune-telling anyway) but I really did feel an intense sense of relief. If there was a fainting chair nearby I'd totally collapse on it like a bad actin' drama queen.

She basically said that I'll have a very happy marriage with a man who loves me deeply.
You know, that honestly feels even better than winning the lottery. :)

I just feel like I'm probably strong and able enough to rely on myself for pretty much everything, but this part of my personal life is the ONLY thing that I cannot fully control. Since I cannot control it, I know that I deal with it by deliberately playing it down... because it'll just happen when it happens?

Mom, I know you read my blog... but I look at you and Dad and I'd rather be alone for the rest of my life than go through all that fighting, bitterness, and divorce. Living in peace (even if it's tinged with a bit of loneliness) is still better than chronic trauma and heartbreak. At the same time, when people ask me whether I now have a scarred perspective on marriage, I actually feel the exact opposite -- it makes me want and appreciate and look forward to a healthy relationship even more. I think I will cherish it more than someone who's never experienced the ugly side.

Oh yes, the also fortune-teller chided me for being way too picky (挑剔 tiaoti). Haha... is that so bad? I think that my future guy will actually end up appreciating that, even after I run him mercilessly through the gauntlet. Pain is pleasure, baby. ;)

[Okay no more ToaSG talk for quite some time. Let's end it on a high note -- I'm borderline bored of this subject now. I'm starting to sound like a crazy cat lady.]