Mr. Bai

Meet Mr. Bai.

His full name translated into Chinese is 白先生 but his owner calls him 小白。He is aptly named, because he is white. And little. And a gentleman. A little white gentleman.

But I've one-upped this nonsense by renaming him 喵咪 (miao mi, or "kitty"). 

You sir, are a kitty. And I shall call you by your genus everyday. And you shall like it (which he does).

Actually the reason why I call him "kitty" is because during his time in my care I've realized that he doesn't respond to "Bai" AT ALL, but that 喵喵 (miao miao) works very effectively. I say "miao miao" the first thing when I get home, and he snakes his way out of his hiding place, prancing over to greet me with a "miao?!!!" It's very cute. :) So now every night we hold deep philosophical conversations, discuss the Presidential debate, he even gives me fashion styling tips. I am, the Cat Whisperer!

I leave my snow leopard hung out to dry as a warning for all misbehaving felines.
I rule my house with a heavy hand. O_O

Yes, I like you around too. :)
Do I have to give you back to Bad Meanie Kevin???

Thought Depository 2

As I get older, I realize just how important self-control and discipline really are. It's easy to restrain yourself when there's logic involved. Many of my friends seek me to be their voice of reason (go figure), the person they turn to when they're feeling lost and confused. Not surprisingly, when it comes to others, I can see causation very clearly and can logically walk them to the necessary solution. But as for myself.... well I am only human. 

I absolutely loathe "drama" and other situations that bring about unproductive emotions. I really do avoid unnecessary things that could flip my inner balance. By no means have I perfected this method, but I've realized peace is an affordable luxury that we silly humans often choose to not take. I try very hard not to let my ego cloud my reasoning, to never hurt others, and to never choose immediate and fleeting satisfaction over far-reaching and meaningful utility. I try to never manifest situations that will cause me regret. And for that reason, when it comes to my personal life, despite my stodgy conservatism, I've advocated being free-spirited and open-minded in this regard... because not giving other people a chance is like not giving yourself a chance. It's really tough to put your pride and doubts aside, but the chance you're taking could lead you to greater happiness and completion. It could be the best gift you will ever give yourself! :) 

Well yea, but it's also kind of a mindfuck. I've discovered when I open myself up, I end up unbalancing myself when expectations are not met (that is the norm). So I shouldn't have expectations at all then, right? With no expectations, there is no reason to have to open up. But if you don't open up, could it be possible that you are letting things slip away? Damn you, too many questions! I'm driving myself nuts with this loop, I should go back to raising my Tamagotchi.

I would really hope that I never have to sell myself hard to be appreciated, valued, loved. I never want to be a circumstantial stop for anyone I find special. I really am such a hopeless romantic, but a ridiculously contradictory rational one at that. Sigh, I wish I weren't such a tough one to crack. It's so annoying.

There are so many unknowns in this universe. The only thing we can control in this world is ourselves. Forget about everything else, it's beyond our reach. Just do your part, and if it is right then it will fit easily. 

I really do believe that. So be satisfied with everything that we have, and have patience with that which will come. Werd. Zzzzz....

Reactivation 重新發電

Yesterday night I went to the Shanghai Power Station of Art to check out the 2012 Shanghai Biennale with a gang of J's and a few A's. :) The place is literally an obsolete power station that was repurposed into a contemporary art museum, a very cool concept that provided more than enough headroom for huge installations. Thanks to Jeff, we experienced something very different and eye-opening. Good times hanging out with a group of very naughty (or shall we say, spirited?) friends, who turned a BBQ debacle into an opportunity for unabashed hor dourves thievery.

The place was HUUUUGE! 

That installation on the left could have been easily 5-6 stories tall.

100 Arms of Guanyin // Huang Yong Ping

I thought this one was very interesting, the arms were holding both everyday and religious objects. Mundane and sacred, I thought reflecting our inner/outer search. Also interesting how Guanyin is deconstructed into just arms on a rack, also sacred but not.

Artists like to make statements on society and human nature. This one was about how everyone is interconnected to one another. I thought it looked like paper terra cotta warriors. :p

This light sculpture was fantastic.

Using some sort of computer program, the artist mapped out a falling feather though these sequential light rods. I think that it's supposed to be dynamic and shift, but I can't imagine how that'd work without becoming impossibly tangled. Love the concept though, wish I could have something like that in my future billion dollar mansion. ;)

Now THIS exhibit was my favorite -- the Mogao Grottos simulation. It had a very special place in my heart because I actually visited Dunhuang 2 years ago. This organization virtually mapped out the interior of Cave 220, which had never been open to the public before. There are sensors around the simulated cave as well as the iPad that you hold, and you can "walk around" the cave through an accurate 360 degree perspective. You can get up close and see all the drawing details, and even check out how the cave would have looked thousands of years ago when freshly painted. Aside from the obvious cool technology factor, I can truly appreciate the work that this organization is doing in preserving our history. It's a gift to mankind. :)

We'd NEVER be able to access this in real life.

And a last parting shot inside the power station's smoke stack!

Absolutely terrifying if you're afraid of heights, and also if you're not. O_O

Maroon Wu!

YES, I was one of those 14 year old prepubescent girls who snatched up Maroon 5 tickets the day that they came out on sale two months ago. AHHHH THEY'RE COMING TO SHANGHAIIIII!!!!! I gathered my girl army of Tracy, Julie, Viv, and cousin Sunny and used hypnosis to make them throw down 700 RMB with me. #winning.

I unabashedly like Maroon 5, and no it's not because I really think Adam Levine is hot (he's oh-kay, I like tattoos but check out his limp wrist action in the third photo, ew), but because their songs always always always put me in a better mood. Like one of those musical robot sunflowers, I'll generally bop my head at anything, sometimes in slow figure eights when it's a nice swaying song, but more often like A Night at the Roxbury. I'm obviously someone cool and fun to be around.

Well, after all that build-up and hype, we kind of screwed up in a royal way. Who has been to a concert that started exactly on the dot? Thank you Maroon 5 for teaching us all a lesson that not all rockers are flaky self-indulgent man-whores, and that it is indeed a virtue to be on time. We ended up being almost an HOUR late to concert because we were stuffing our faces at Jean Georges' Mercato and took a leisurely walk to the Mercedes Benz Center. I was quite sad. I only got to sing 20% of the songs that I memorized over the last sixty days, dammit!!! Hahahaha :p No, really. I was really sad.

In China you wear light-up Hello Kitty bows instead of devil horns at a pop-rock concert.

But we did end up hearing the best songs in the 45 minutes that we were there, and they ended with the crowd pleaser Moves Like Jagger. We continued the night at the concert afterparty held at the ever trusty Apartment, where someone very bright (Ty) thought it a good idea to buy a bottle of tequila and get everyone completely smashed on a Tuesday night. That's how we roll, folks.

Before.

After.

Hm.

No, this is not me.

I think it's kind of weird that the number of people visiting my blog spikes during NYFW. It's because y'all are googling "Aila Wang". Don't think I don't know. It's ok so long as you guys aren't sick pervs, because yes she does have an awesome wardrobe as a 3 year old kid. Otherwise, I have your IP address and I will report you.

Dammit! This just proves that I am less interesting than a 2 foot leather-clad Barbie doll.

Figures. :)

Wattup.

Bury your gold.

Shutter your doors.

Hide your men.

Quiet your babies.

And pray that the Pirate Captain doesn't hear you sneeze.

Cap'n Miffy's got her groove back, bitches!

Whahahahahaha.....!

To Bali.

I just came back from Bali for yet another unforgettable wedding, and I'm starting to think that I might have already seen perfection after basking in Viv and (and now) Jess' happily wedded bliss. :) You can always find me at a wedding reliably wiping away tears, steadily and surely turning into a scary (and snot faced) panda before the ceremony is over. I cry because these are my friends, and I am so damn happy for them. I know that it wasn't easy for any couple to reach this milestone, and that this a giant victory. WE. ARE. THE. CHAMPIONS!!! I feel blessed and honored to be able to witness such an important milestone in my friends' lives, and rejoice in their personal success. 

Jess & Chris, their first dance.

There are two topics that I wanted to write about after this trip to Bali. I just got off a Skype conversation with my mom, and she asked me about the details of this wedding, how I felt about the style and choices. My general rule of thumb about people is -- to each their own. Just like how each individual is different, their choices in an ideal partner, concept of success, measurement of happiness, personal and life values, tastes and preferences will always be different. There is no "good" or "bad", "better" or "worse" -- even if someone throws a poorly planned wedding, the point is to celebrate this moment with the newly wed couple (who have bad planning skills, oh well). Jessica's wedding was not poorly planned, in fact it was like a fairytale, grander and more perfect than anyone would have imagined. That's Jessica. And she deserved it.

I haven't given much thought to my own wedding since I'm not quite there yet... there are several key criteria missing. ;) And I surprise myself when I say that I'm really not worried one single bit. 隨緣 (sui2 yuan3), follow the flow, grow organically. I believe one day I will meet and marry the love of my life, and the only thing I will care about is our journey after, not the wedding.

==============

Another thing I wanted to write about was how strange it was that Bali was such a weird hub in my personal life over these two years. I've been to Bali four times already over the last two years. I've been to Bali three times over the past one year. The rest of Southeast Asia has sadly gotten the silent treatment. Each of my trips have been quite momentous, defining a different stage of my life.

My first ever trip to Bali was with G. We were in a pretty good place in our relationship, and wanted to get away from dirty Nanjing for a real vacation. I was happy to be in his company, and optimistic about our future. I was quite content, and I thought that he must be too.

My second trip to Bali was right after we broke up. It was the most excruciating experience, but the shock dulled the pain of how it all unfolded. However, over the week I trained and steeled myself against any bouts of weakness, and promised myself to never look back. I am very proud of my resolve.

My third trip to Bali was to celebrate Viv and Howie's wedding, a most spectacular affair with my closest friends from Shanghai. When I arrived in Shanghai, I barely knew anyone besides my boss. I threw myself into this very lonely and strange environment, but was somehow was lucky to get adopted by this second family of ours. It was only then that Shanghai felt like home, and so being able to go to Bali with all of my wonderful friends was a testament that life was good. Very very good.

My fourth and most recent trip to Bali was celebrate Jessica's wedding, which was like watching a dream materialize before our very eyes. This time I think the connecting theme was forgiveness. There were quite a few mended fences, and I am so incredibly happy to have this chance to reunite with old friends. Even though I was only able to stay in Bali for 48 hours, all of this was expended on positive energy. Also, a few days before this trip, my curiosity finally won me over and I finally decided to take a peek at the dedication. It was almost exactly one year after the second trip. The message was clear, but reality still remains. I delved into this thinking that I really wouldn't feel anything, but ended up mourning once again. I thought about it during Bali, asking myself whether this acknowledgement even mattered, whether it changed anything?

No, it doesn't.
It's stupid to waste energy on unconstructive thoughts and actions.

To Bali.
To life.
To love.
And to my future. :)