Thoughts: CNY Migration

[Don't mind me if this is a bit of a ramble, it's pouring in Shanghai and I haven't left my apartment all day. A first!]

Chinese New Year is just around the corner, and I'm both mentally and physically preparing for the most important trip of the year -- New York bound!!! I've bought little gifts for people and I'm setting up my schedule already. I'm steeling myself against getting all emotional when I see my family, and then emotional again when I have to go. I have 10 days, but it won't feel enough.

Chinese New Year is the only time of the year when I can absolutely guarantee my family that I'll be home to see them. It's an inviolable rule, sacred because this holiday remains to be the only constant amidst all our life changes. It's important for everyone's mental health to have this yearly milestone so that we can comfort one another that no matter where we are, what we've become, we will always have each other. Otherwise, what currency does  "Don't worry about me, I'll be fine. I'll see you soon." have? How can we look forward to empty promises? Particularly in this day and age of continual distractions (and opportunities), despite the ease of communication tools such as Facebook and What's App, I think it's easy to lose touch with the most important people in your life if you don't deliberately take the time to set your priorities.

I perform a litmus test on what "home" is each time I go back to New York. Right now, "home" remains firmly in New York because it's where my mom, dad, grandparents, and brother live (so far). It is also where I was born and continually spent 25 years of my life, so seeing familiar places is comforting. But it backfires a little when your local bodega turns into a Duane Reade, when you hear that your 3rd Grade teacher has passed away, when the dirty Flushing canal is turned into a brand spankin' new mall. I can see myself adjusting my origin point more and more as the intangible factors that keep me rooted start to change, like when my best friends move away to different parts of the world, or when my dad spends more and more time in Taiwan... and the big moment will come when my grandparents pass away one day. When all that happens, my mom and my brother will be the only reasons why I absolutely need to come back to New York, and I think by then they'd prefer to take them on holiday instead.

Now this may sound a little outrageous, even presumptuous of me, but maybe because of my own displacement, I truly and deeply sympathize with China's migrant workers' struggle to procure ways to get back home during Chinese New Year. Chinasmack and Chinahush have been publishing articles that are worth reading... they'll pull at you if you're not a cold-hearted ogre. These stories turn me into mush.

After living in China for over a year (especially after being in a 2nd-tier city like Nanjing and doing graduate work in China Studies) I think that I have a pretty solid grasp on modern Chinese societal problems. There are a couple of stand-out examples that helped me understand why China is the way it is (aka, really fucked up). The most poignant and personal example was when I got my wallet stolen during rush-hour on the way to school. The person reached into my bag and fished out my wallet, took the money and dumped the remains in a garbage bin right next to the bus stop. When I found out, I felt so violated and disgusted. I've been lucky to never been pickpocketed in my life so far, and despite the many parental warnings ("Keep your bag zipped up! Put it in front of you! Are you listening?!?!!!!!") I was shocked that it actually happened to me, and I lost all that allowed me to survive in China (my keys, ATM/credit cards, school ID, driver's license, etc). At that moment I painted everyone on the bus as low-life scum, and man... you should know that I give the best evil eye. Truly Medusa-like. But afterwards, a Chinese student told me that pickpocketing and crime peaks the month before Chinese New Year. I was just another statistic in this trend. I thought about the reason behind this sudden upsurge, and realized that it is because these people succumb to the pressure to buy gifts and spend money in preparation to see their families. The person who stole my money may not be a serial thief, but someone who was desperate enough to resort to thievery to solve his problems. For example, a migrant worker (mostly 18-45 year old men) spends the entire year away from his parents and children, and is the hope and lifeline of the entire family. He brings home money to send his children to school, electric blankets, snacks, and toys. He never sees his children grow up, but he knows that he must work in the city so his children CAN grow up. He never sees his parents grow old, but he must leave them alone so they can grow old in comfort.  The weight of it all would crush us first-world citizens. From my personal experience, when I ask people in China where they're from, 80% of the time I don't get "Shanghai". China may seem homogeneous to outsiders, but there is practically no where else in the world where society is as striated and fragmented as it is here.

Of course, there's also the possibility that my thief isn't a migrant, but even city residents encounter a lot of pressure to meet expectations. My real estate agent in Nanjing, a young man 23 years of age from a small village, told me that he is incredibly stressed everyday because he has to save enough money to buy a house, and then only then can he get married. He makes probably 2,000 RMB a month. My apartment in Shanghai is 5,000 RMB a month. A 80m2 apartment in Nanjing is on average 800,000 RMB. In his current situation, there is zero chance that he'll meet this basic goal, and that reduces man into a twisted helpless state. He always wanted to hang out and be friends, but I just didn't feel comfortable given our different lifestyles. I didn't want to accidentally flaunt my privileged background in his face, which would have inevitably happened since Chinese LOVE asking the question "How much does that cost?" (and the answer would have been just awkward silence, whatever I say will be no good for me). A few months ago he emailed me out of the blue asking me for help. I said sure, I'll help you in any way I can. He said that he lost everything, his girlfriend of 5 years broke up with him because he had cheated on her, and he didn't know what to do. Now that's not something that I can help him with, nor do I have any sympathy for that sort of behavior... so I never replied. From a moral standpoint, the guy made his bed so he has to sleep in it. But I thought about the situation, and why he reached out to me, someone that only met him twice (both times so I could close the deal on my rental) and a smattering of email exchanges. It was probably a desperate move to find some answers, and given what he told me about his outlook on life, he's become a financially-strapped young man... with no mate. One of millions and the bottom of society.

Everyone needs a reason to live. But the way Chinese society is currently structured certainly doesn't give its people a lot. Chinese people can take a lot of shit in general, but through the annual degeneration of the ability to go home makes me feel like something's gonna break real soon. It makes me genuinely sad to know that it's impossible for many people to go home and spend time with their families for the most important holiday of the year. The government needs to continue to work on this short-term by improving its transportation network, long-term by closing economic disparities through the promotion of rural income growth.

If someone like me misses home and family under very comfortable surroundings, then it blows my mind how migrant workers must feel. Their problems are exponential compared to mine, but the worst part is that there's not much of a way out. As people say, problems that money can solve aren't real problems. I'm glad that I know that all it takes for me is about a thousand bucks and a plea for vacation time.

SEE YOU IN NEW YORK!!! :D